DaLaM hAtI aDa TaMAn

heyy..

i don't know why i was being all miss-sensitive-and-gloomy this past few days. or, since my practical training started, to be more accurate. i presumed it was all because of the hormones, you know with the PMS-thingy that girls get every month. what a bummer. coz due to this, every single little things, and even the little insignificant one, can make me feel hurt, and causes streaming of tears to fall down through my cheek sometimes.

I mean, get this, just now i was crying when watching Glee. it's Glee guys. who cries when they watch Glee? it is understandable if the scene was sad, but no. it was a happy scene, with all the cast dancing and flying and jumping around and singing together in a glee. it was a happy scene. and yet i cried when watching that. it's just that, i missed having fun like that. i missed my friends. i missed being surrounded with lots of people, talk about everything, joking around, made fun of others (in a good-non-bullying type ways) and just, be happy.

since practical started i had feel nothing but alone and unhappy, having no friends to talk to, to share the training experience i had, to eat together... honestly, i think i spent 3/4 of the 9 hours of my practical hour everyday being quiet and..yes, just being quiet. walking alone to everywhere and all...and that is just sucks. it hurts me in every way a hurt can hurts a person.

being alone is the thing that i hate the most in my life. if there is a thing that can breaks me to pieces, and causing this tears to fall down heavily, it is this.

T_T wish i had applied ppukm instead..